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Datemates: the Perfect Solution?
Lee Min-ji Cub Reporter  |  planetz@yonsei.ac.kr
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승인 2006.03.01  00:00:00
트위터 페이스북 구글 카카오스토리

DATEMATES ARE a big trend among young Koreans these days. Then, do you know what datemates are? It literally means what it says: mates whom you go out on dates with. They are different from lovers because you can have many datemates without feeling guilty and you don't have to actually be in a serious relationship with that person. So it could be a good excuse and a solution for people who don't want to commit themselves into a relationship but still want to have fun. But, is it really the perfect solution? We listened to what Yonseians think about it.

Jo Byung-chul
Sr., Dept. of Bus. Admin.

   


  I think datemates are one way of meeting a person and there is nothing wrong with it. People tend to attach with each other as they start dating seriously. This can be a burden to some people. Moreover, since we are still students, I think a casual relationship in which the person you are dating is a friend and a lover, is much better than a deep relationship. If both sides agree on being datemates, this could actually be a great way. However, the most important thing that should be kept in mind is that both sides go through a talk to clarify the limits and meaning of their relationship.

Chung Jee-yun
Soph., Area of Social Science

   


  I don't criticize other people for having datemates because it's their choice but personally I wouldn't have a datemate. I think the relationship between datemates is very superficial. They date for their own sake not because they like the other person. Some people have datemates for skinship. Others date each other for reputation; they don't want to be involved in a relationship but want to boast that they are attractive enough. In short, datemates are just a meaningless contract between those people.

Peter Chang
KLI student from U.S.A

   


  I am absolutely for datemates. It's much better than committing to a relationship before you wholly know a person and end breaking up. If you are in a casual relationship with another person, you have more opportunities to actually get to know that person. Moreover, why would you commit yourself to only one person before getting married? I myself have had datemates and many people do too in the States. It's a natural phenomenon so people don't criticize other people for having datemates.

Natallia Bulynia
KLI student from Belarus

   


  I think datemates are a bit strange because dating someone without any sincere feelings seems as if you are only using that person. In my country, there are not many people who have datemates. There are although some people, usually women, who have datemates for economic reasons. For example, when they don't have money but want to have fun, they call men to have dates with them. All in all, if both sides have agreed on being datemates there is no problem with that, but personally I don't understand it.

Han Keum-youn
University College

   

  Datemates are part of the "cool" culture. Young people tend to prefer instant, easy and convenient relationships in which they can get what they want from their partner and not commit themselves in a deep relationship. In a social aspect, the rise and expansion of individualism is why people have datemates. As people grow up, they can emancipate from their parents' meddling but face a similar kind of interference from their lovers. Since people do not want this interference and want to maintain an independent life, they tend to find people who have similar cultural preferences whom they can date casually with. Datemates are not simply a trend; it's a new form of relationship. Therefore, instead of criticizing datemates, we should lead it in a positive direction through a profound introspection of relationship.

* Photographed by Kim Young-sung

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