“WHERE ARE you from?” is an easy question for many, but for Marco Altieri, it is one of the most complicated questions to answer. “A common conversation would begin like this: ‘My dad’s Italian, and my mom’s Malaysian Chinese. But I spent 10 years in China, 4 years in Italy, 2 years in Hong Kong, and now I’m attending university in Melbourne.’ ‘Really? Then can you speak Mandarin?’ Sometimes I have to prove my complicated background by speaking Mandarin. And when I do, people are shocked by how fluent I am and how I don’t have an accent,” says Altieri, in an interview with The Yonsei Annals. He is a Third Culture Kid, someone who has spent their formative years away from their parents’ culture. But the term itself is more than just its definition—it’s a trend.

Introducing Third Culture Kids

   The term “Third Culture Kids” (TCKs) was first introduced by American anthropologists and sociologists John and Ruth Hill Useem in the 1960s, during their study of expatriate families in India. It then started to be widely dealt with during the 1990s, with the rise of mass media and an increasing number of careers in multinational corporations*. The term used to only focus on the children of expatriate workers, but it has since been expanded to include those from transnational and multicultural families. Nowadays, TCKs include even those who, from their developmental years, attended international schools in their own country**, and have been exposed to cultures different from their own.

   Living abroad from a young age, TCKs are introduced to three cultures: their cultural heritage, the culture of the countries they live in, and the interstitial culture that arises from their exposure to different cultures***. The Useems explained that this “third culture” is formed by the social interaction that is mutually shared only by the TCKs themselves who undergo the same type of cross-cultural experience. David C. Pollock and Ruth E. Van Reken, in their book Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds, further introduces newly coined terms for TCKs that vary according to their parents’ careers—“Biz kids” for those whose parents work in international corporations, “MKs” for those whose parents are missionaries, and “Diplo brats” for those whose parents are diplomats or work in nongovernmental organizations, to name a few.

   Due to their unique backgrounds, TCKs have many characteristics: they are diverse, fluent in many languages, have friends all around the world. But one particular trait stands out among them all—identity crisis. Identity, defined by the Cambridge English Dictionary as “who a person is, or the qualities of a person that make them different from others,” is a crucial part in defining who we are and where we belong in the world. When we start to question that sense of self, we experience identity crisis. This term was first introduced by developmental psychologist Erik Erikson, who argued that our personalities are shaped by the crises we face and overcome. According to Healthline, this often occurs due to significant or sudden changes in life that cause stress, which can heavily destabilize our daily lives and influence how we perceive ourselves. By being exposed to different cultures from such a young age, TCKs undergo sudden significant changes in their lives; as they are influenced by multiple cultures and ways of living, they are more prone to experience some form of identity crisis.

The TCKs of yesterday

   “We never referred to ourselves as ‘third culture kids.’ I only became aware of the term in my 30s,” said Nancy Kim, in an interview with the Annals. Nancy’s family is of Korean descent, but she was born in Canada and grew up in the Philippines, and later in Korea. Her family moved often due to her father’s job as a missionary; she identified herself as a “missionary kid”—an “MK.” Nancy is a third culture kid from Generation X: those born between 1965-1980, followed by Generation Y. This generation, also known as the MTV generation, was the first to experience the rise of personal computing; however, their understanding of the world was still very limited to their own cultural bubble****. “Back then, being different was still an oddity. When I grew up in Canada, a lot of people didn’t know Korea. The ’88 Olympics hadn’t happened then, and obviously, the Korean wave hadn’t happened,” explained Nancy.

   In the interview, Nancy described the struggles she faced. “There’s a sense of feeling sorry for yourself. In movies, you see people who grow up in the same town where everyone knows each other. By the time you graduate, you know everybody and their families. I never felt that; I always dealt with people leaving, or me leaving,” she said, showing how this led her to dislike getting close to people. “I knew that either one of us would eventually leave. Nothing was permanent. I never become friends with someone and think ‘oh we’re going to live in the same area and our kids will grow up together.’ Moving to other countries have become more common nowadays, but back then you didn’t move around much,” she said. She then explained how she felt apologetic towards her Korean heritage. “I tried very hard to assimilate into Canadian culture, which for me was the more dominant culture while growing up. My family would often hide our Korean sides, and we tried to be as Canadian as possible.”

   “Being a TCK, you have that classic ‘where am I really from?’ conundrum: When I’m in Korea, people only see my Canadian side; they only see my differences, and in Canada, people ask me where I’m really from. You always have one foot in this culture, another foot in another culture,” said Nancy. She also explained how language made her feel like an outsider. “My parents insisted that I learn English first, because they didn’t want me to feel left out in Canada. My Korean failed because of that, and I didn’t speak Korean until much later,” she explained, claiming that she had always felt a little bit on the outside, like a wang-dda*****. “But for me, I’ve always identified as a Korean more. I just felt like Koreans never fully accepted me, but I want so much to be accepted,” she added. She went on and explained how being a TCK has helped her adapt to new environments. “You develop a lot of coping mechanisms growing up, because you have to. You’re always the new kid, always the one dropped in a new scary environment; as for me, the only constant was my family. As a TCK, you either sink or you swim. You deal with it or you don’t.”

   Despite the struggles and identity crises she encountered, Nancy explained that there are still a lot of advantages to being a TCK. “I feel that a lot of people who grow up in one culture, also grow up in their own cultural silos; being overseas, you grow out of them. You meet new people who think and behave differently. You become more open-minded, and become more understanding of others’ differences,” she talked about how her identity as a TCK widened her experiences, broadened her horizons, and opened up her mind. “Our identity is composed of footnotes; we could say one thing about ourselves, but there are so many side notes to who we are. I think knowing that about myself, I always give people the benefit of the doubt,” she said, highlighting how she learned to never assume anything about anybody.

   “Home is where my true heart lies. Wherever I am, that’s home,” she said, explaining that because her family is spread out in different parts of the world, “home” couldn’t be family for her. She explains how she recently bought her apartment when the landlord wanted to sell the house and asked her to move out. “‘No, I can’t move. You don’t understand... Fine, I’ll buy it’ was what I told the landlord. As a TCK, I’ve come to have such dislike for moving, for uprooting myself and moving somewhere else. I guess you’ve done it so much throughout your life, you’re sick of it. That’s why I’m trying to build this place into my home.”

The TCKs of today

   Today, our world is more connected and ethnically diverse than ever before. We  are living in Generation Z, also known as the centennial generation, referring to those born between 1996-2010. It is the generation known to be raised on and by the Internet****** along with the numerous technological innovations of the Fourth Industrial Revolution. The advent of social media helps us stay hyper-connected, even to those who are physically distant from us. With an increase in international jobs, schools, and communities, we are noticing a significant rise in cultural diversity in our society. According to a United Nations survey, the number of international migrants has increased by 41% since 2000, hitting 244 million in 2016; this category covers all refugees, immigrants, expatriates, to name a few.

   The general struggles of a TCK seem to remain the same even today, in a whole new generation. “Being able to speak fluent Korean and looking like a ‘normal’ Korean was confusing,” said Kim Hyun-sol, a third culture kid, in an interview with the Annals. Her family is Korean, but they moved to Turkey when she was two years old, due to her parents’ jobs. She lived in Turkey her whole life until her family moved to Germany, where she attended an international high school. She then moved back to Korea for university. Hyun-sol described how difficult it was for her to get accustomed to Korean culture and new slang when people already expected her to know them by heart. Altieri also shared his experience, “I don’t completely follow every single aspect of Italian culture, Malaysian culture, or Chinese culture. I noticed that, especially in university, those with similar cultures like to hang out with each other. So it’s quite difficult for someone like me to join in.” He emphasizes how not fully understanding a specific culture often leads to difficulties in socializing with those who do adhere to the core of a culture. “I guess it doesn’t matter how open the group is. The specific culture itself is just so ingrained into that social group—the way they talk, the way they act—that often I feel indirectly ostracized and uncomfortable,” he explained.

   The topic of TCKs and their identity crises has been heavily dealt with in today’s media, but Generation Z TCKs do not seem to experience identity crisis as much. “I personally didn’t have a major identity crisis,” shared Hyun-sol. When she felt out of place, talking to her friends and family would remind her of where she belonged. Altieri also mentioned how he never really experienced an identity crisis. “I think it’s mainly because I don’t put that much emphasis on belonging to a culture. Sometimes it does bother me a little bit, especially when I meet new people and have to introduce my complicated background to them, but that’s about it.” He went on and explained how this is in large part due to the mindset of how he views himself. “I think as a teenager, I didn’t prioritize choosing a specific culture as a part of my identity. Identity is more about the way we act, our moral compasses, and the experiences that shaped us. It’s more of the individual rather than the individual being a part of a specific culture. I feel that keeping this mindset has helped me avoid facing an identity crisis.” Perhaps this shift in mindset has something to do with the generation we live in. The number of TCKs is rising, and so are heterogenous communities we often call “melting pot” and “salad bowl.” “TCKs, at the end of the day, are like their own culture. It’s more like a cocktail; it’s just a mix of cultures,” said Altieri. He highlighted how TCKs today are more normalized compared to a few years before, and that they are in fact an admirable oddity.

   “People actually thought it was pretty cool,” expressed Altieri, shedding light on the benefits of being a TCK. He points out how most TCKs are fluent in different languages and are open to various cultures. “I feel that TCKs, since they don’t identify themselves with one specific culture, are naturally more open-minded when it comes to seeing different ways of life that might come off as exotic to someone deeply rooted in one culture.” Hyun-sol also described how being a TCK led her to value interpersonal relationships more. “Being used to saying goodbyes as a TCK has made me realize how important and special friendships are.”

   Although TCKs come from different places all around the world, they do seem to have a common “home”—people. For them, “home” could be everywhere and nowhere, depending on where their loved ones are at. In their book, Pollock and Van Reken explained that because TCKs define their roots not with geography but with people, they often go to greater lengths to form and maintain interpersonal relationships. “Home is where I’m comfortable with myself and the people around me. For me, that’s anywhere my family is,” said Altieri. “For me, home is not a place. Home for me is people—my parents and my friends,” expressed Hyun-sol, as she also emphasizes how she is most comfortable when she is with the people she cherishes.

The TCKs of tomorrow

   As seen from the stories above, Generation X and Generation Z provided different environments and circumstances for the third culture kids. The growth of mass media, international education, multinational careers, and tourism has significantly influenced how TCKs were perceived by others and themselves. Their liminal “third” culture has become more accepted as generations pass, with increasingly more TCKs sharing similar cultural experiences and identities.

   Nowadays, many online platforms are starting to provide networks dedicated to TCKs. One such example is the “Subtle Asian Traits” group on Facebook, where TCKs mainly post jokes or memes regarding Asian culture and Asian diaspora. It was founded in 2018 by a few Chinese-Australian high school students and now has over 1.8 million members. It has since branched out into several similar groups, including “Subtle Korean Traits,” “Subtle Taiwanese Traits,” and so on. Through these online platforms, many TCKs can grasp a sense of belonging and community, strengthening their “third” culture.

   TCKs, by molding and defining their own heterogeneous culture and identity, are preparing themselves for the future. The various cultures they were exposed to while growing up, along with the open-mindedness and global perspectives they now possess, will undoubtedly help them stay levelheaded in the hectic yet interconnected world we live in today.

*Merriam Webster

**BBC News

***Oxford Bibliographies

****Kasasa

*****Wang-dda: Korean term referring to a social outcast

******Business Insider